Showing posts with label occult. Show all posts
Showing posts with label occult. Show all posts

Monday, February 19, 2018

"Hunting children is the riskiest venture of all..." Isaac thinks it'll be fun. / THE SCENE, RABBIT REDEMPTION by Ellen C. Maze


Rakum (RAH′-kum) – a.k.a Wraith, from Heb. raca; “vain thing.” Def: From Semitic mythology; a race of vampire-like beings thought to be descended from fallen angels.



THE CHARACTERS:

Isaac Akaron, the newly arrived boy-leader of the Rakum, more powerful than the Ten Fathers and as ruthless as their spirit-master, Ta’avah, whose violence and lust for power had no limit.

Beryl, had once been a respected Captain among the Rakum, but under Isaac, everyone is reduced to nothing.
THE SCENE:
Isaac had been kept underground fifty years as a young Rakum. Now he is free, and Beryl's job is to show him the ropes, specifically, how to abduct the children Elder Canaan needs to grow stronger... 
THE NOVEL: Rabbit Redemption by Ellen C Maze, a unique and provocative twist on the vampire legend.

Ch.15




Pearl, MS

November 9th, 8 p.m.



E

merald High School’s Ray Rogers Stadium was packed with people of all ages coming, going, and cheering on all sides. Isaac and Beryl walked through the throng, heading for the darker far end. The Mississippi winter had finally rolled in and Isaac clutched his jacket collar. He flipped up the hood and glared at his companion who ignored the icy wind that lashed his face and neck. Beryl had a lot more experience being uncomfortable.

“I hate this weather!” Isaac barked and stepped lively to keep up with Beryl’s long stride. “Slow down, you walk too fast.”

Beryl slowed his pace. “Big brothers hate little brothers, Master. If you struggle to keep up, it’ll be more believable.”

Isaac frowned, but did as suggested. Beryl was infinitely more adept at hunting mortals and it was wise to bow to his skill. He had hoped that by sharing the guy’s memories he’d also adopt his abilities. As it turned out, not so much. No big deal, Beryl would teach him. He might not always have servants at his command. Life was unpredictable; Isaac learned this the day the Rabbit Beth Rider destroyed everything he knew.

“There,” Beryl said telepathically and stopped short. Isaac followed his line of sight and at the end of the crowded bleachers, three giggling pre-teens jogged into the dark shadows of the adjacent school building. “I’m going to creep up and listen to them and gauge their weaknesses…”

“Good. And hurry, I’m freezing,” Isaac replied silently. Beryl shot him an irritated glance that instantly softened; the guy was learning. Isaac was young and inexperienced, but he was the only one sufficiently empowered to run the Rakum race. Even after Last Assembly, he disappeared with Father Damien who spent every waking moment teaching him the skills he would need to take over leadership of the flailing brotherhood. Isaac smiled at nothing; he was definitely up to the challenge.

“Listen,” Beryl whispered and Isaac concentrated on the three youths speaking a dozen yards away in the shadows.

“…I spent it yesterday at Target. What about you? Your mom gives you money for the game, right?”

“I had to give it to my stupid sister. She made me promise to pay her back today and I was afraid to not do it. Last time I owed her money and didn’t pay on time, my daddy tanned my hide.”

“Well, I have three bucks. Wanna see if Gregory has any money? He usually does.”

“No, he stinks—I mean, he literally smells. Let’s go ask your mom. She’s in the stands, right?”

“She won’t give me any more money. Dad lost his job and she’s all depressed.”

The trio started walking again, heading away, deep in conversation. Beryl pulled two twenties from his wallet and handed them to Isaac.

“These kids look about twelve. They’ll spook at me because I’m older.”  

“Just tell me what to do,” Isaac sent back, keeping an eye on the kids as they sauntered away. Beryl filled him in on the plan, assuring him it worked many times for him in the past. Isaac nodded when he was ready and Beryl headed back to the car. Plan initiated, Isaac proceeded toward the kids.

When he was a good twenty feet behind them, the one in the middle, an Asian girl with long straight hair took her hands out of her jacket pockets to playfully slap one of her friends. Isaac saw his chance.

“Hey, guys,” he called and jogged up behind them. “Hey, I think you dropped this.”

All three turned at the sound of his voice and none of them seemed alarmed. The girl’s eyes widened at the sight of the two bills and she took furtive glances at her friends.

“What?” the boy on her right asked. He was the tallest of the three, but no taller than Isaac.

Isaac held the money out toward the girl. “Just now, when you took your hands out of your coat, this fell down from your pocket.”

“Oh, yeah,” the girl said and stepped closer to grasp the money. “My mom puts money in my coat all the time. I forgot.” She caught her friends’ eyes and they grinned.

Isaac put on a friendly smile and hoped it would get him an invitation to join them. The two boys didn’t like him right off, but it had everything to do with his wholesome appearance, not that he wasn’t human. The girl favored him a lot and she gave him a dimpled smile.

“Do you go to Jones High?” she asked, gesturing to the visitors’ side of the stadium. Isaac nodded. “I’m Minji, and this is Fred and Hank.”

“Hey,” he replied. “So, are you guys heading to the front of the school? My brother said there’s a fight going on there. S’posed to be pretty cool.”

“Oh, yeah?” Hank asked, looking behind him. “I’d like to see that.”

“Yeah, some kid named Gregory is getting his butt whooped,” Isaac said and started walking. “I’m on my way to see it myself.”

“Stinky Gregory’s done messed up now!” Fred said and joined Isaac. The other two fell in, laughing and making jokes about their wayward classmate.

By the time they reached the school’s quiet front yard, Beryl had parked the car and was leaning against the hood. The lot was surprisingly dark and the kids would only see his silhouette until they were closer.

Isaac touched Fred’s shoulder and pointed to Beryl. “There’s my brother. Let’s ask him what happened.”

The gullible kids scampered alongside Isaac, completely fearless. When they reached the BMW, Beryl gave them a bored look.

“What happened? Is the fight over?” Isaac asked him.

“Where’d they go? I can’t believe we missed it!” Hank said.

“How’d they disappear so fast?” Minji asked.

Isaac waited for Beryl’s signal and he opened the back door of the car. Taking one last look around the deserted schoolyard, Isaac and Beryl simultaneously rushed the youngsters and shoved them into the waiting car. Before they could begin to yell for real, both he and Beryl were loaded and the doors closed. Beryl peeled away from the school and joined the traffic leaving the stadium while Isaac silenced the kids with a powerful suggestion.

“Be quiet and I won’t kill you,” he sent the three kids telepathically. Years of watching television and horror movies hadn’t desensitized the children to a real threat as they shivered and fell silent. Isaac relaxed in his seat in the front and caught Beryl’s eye.

“Good job,” Beryl sent silently.

“Great job, you mean,” Isaac replied.

Beryl nodded. “Canaan will enjoy this gift.”

Isaac nodded, smiling ear-to-ear and looked out his window. It was in his best interest to keep Canaan healthy. The only Rakum left more powerful than Canaan was one he wanted to drink from next—Theophilus. Then he’d explore powers he’d only dreamed of. Damien said he’d be able to transport himself great distances, disappear from human view, that he would even be able to fly if he continued on his current path. Flying. That would be sweet.


Read another excerpt:  https://goo.gl/b6YM7K 
See the novel on Amazon in softcover and eBook: https://goo.gl/aBpV1T 
See the novel and the entire series on the website, purchase as a discount: www.ellencmaze.com


Sunday, October 8, 2017

FICTION WRITERS- Getting help with a foreign character's DIALOGUE "De nada"




RABBIT FANS remember the Australian character, Rakum Cow Stuart Loudon, from Rabbit Legacy. He runs into Canaan at a Rest Area one night when Canaan needs a "buzz." In the upcoming third installment (Rabbit Redemption, Little Roni Publishers Jan 2018), he has a much larger role. Because of this, I needed help with his dialogue. I'm not Australian so my scope of Aussie dialect and language comes from Hollywood. 

HERE'S MY SOLUTION. The following is a helpful blog on what to do when your character isn't you!

DIALOGUE HELP: So what if your character is Australian and you're not? When I write fiction, my characters come as they are--I don't choose them, they arrive already formed. That means they aren't all White, Female, American, Christian, Southern Belles (touché). Thanks to social media, nearly every writer has friends around the country who they can ask for help to make sure their character sounds real and not "Hollywood."

Recently, I asked my friend and fellow author Stu Loudon for help bringing my Aussie character's dialogue to life. I know all about my character's personality, but not how he might say certain things. I asked Stu to help and he said YES.

IF YOU GET HELP, go through your novel and select portions where you need the friend to help out. Don't send the whole novel, or even the entire chapter--this will greatly slow down the response time. Send only what the friend needs above and beyond the dialogue to add his or her special native touch. Then, you should highlight the dialogue so your friend can go right to it easily. Keep in mind, no matter how much a friend or fan likes your work, he or she is busy 24/7 just like you are! Lastly, offer to pay them enough for a nice dinner. Trust me, there are a dozen good reasons to give a little monetary thank you for this help.

USING THE INTERNET: Sometimes you have to use the internet for this help. I googled "Aussie slang" in case my friend was too busy to help and dozens of sites came up. Of course, I would have bungled the job -- Americans wouldn't notice, but anyone who ever knew a true Australian would know I used the internet to make my character speak!

FINAL NOTE ABOUT GOOGLE TRANSLATE: Sometimes, your character speaks another language, or uses foreign phrases in his daily speech. For example, I have several Latino characters who may exclaim*, "Madre de dios!" or "Meirda!", or my German character may say, "jah," etc. etc. We all use Google Translate to make short sentences for our books. That is my advice--use it only for short items. It is not perfect, and if you know anyone who speaks that language, ask them to check it.

RABBIT TRILOGY
Author Beth Rider writes a vampire novel that angers a race of "real" vampires living under the radar since before Christ. Learn more at www.ellencmaze.com.

*Use proper punctuation, too. This blog doesn't support upside-down exclamation points. :)